A Contest, Honest

Playing With Poison
The audiobook is out
You haven’t read it?
No need to pout
Just finish this poem
And give me a shout

Five audio prizes
I am giving away
You’ve read this far
So what do you say?
This is free, people
You won’t have to pay

So leave me a comment
If you’re intrigued but at all
But hurry, don’t wait,
Don’t forget, and don’t stall
And you could be listening
And having a ball

I’ll choose five winners
Five lucky souls
On Saturday, May 3
This contest will close
Who will I choose?
Nobody knows!

But this Cue Ball audio
Might be yours for the taking
Yes, it’s exciting
This scheme I am baking
If you are a winner
Your hands will be shaking!

Once you have your
Free audio code in hand
Listen up and laugh
But don’t just there stand
And here’s my request
But not a command

It you like what you hear
And I’m quite sure you will
I’ll ask you to take out
Your book-reviewing quill
And leave a review at Amazon
About this audio-book thrill

All Rights Reserved

Fine print:  To be eligible for a free Audible version of “Playing With Poison” leave a comment on this blog post.  Five winners will be selected from the comments left through Saturday, May 3, and each winner will receive a code for a free Audible copy of Playing With Poison. You will need to have an account at Audible.com to use this prize. Note, this is not a CD copy of the book. Thanks for your interest 🙂

 

The Voice of Jessie: Round One Done!

One Cue Ball done
Three more to go
As with most stuff
The process is slow
Thought you’d be curious
So am letting you know
Playing With Poison
Now on audio!

The Voice Of Jessie
Wait ‘til you hear
Several auditioned
Then she appeared
Caroline Miller-
Definitely top tier
I heard her do Jessie
And dismissed all my fears

Rye, Candy, Karen
And so many more
You’ll love Geez Louise
Even Jimmy’s got allure
Caroline has skills
And great talent galore
A treat for your ears
Now is in store!

Playing With Poison on Audio is available at Amazon, of course!

All rights reserved

 

Slower Than Slow

After four books
You’d think I would know
How to write fast
And not super-slow

The premise is there
At the edge of my brain
But writing it down
Can drive me insane

A sentence a day
Sometimes that’s it!
The words just don’t fly
It causes me fits

A perfectionist I am,
A stickler for detail
I try for expedience
But often I fail

So if you expect
My new book next week
I confess to you here
Your prospects are bleak

All Rights Reserved

A Poet’s Lament

Hubby is quiet
Most of the time
Except when I
Am trying to rhyme

I compose a poem
Once every week
I aim for jolly
And never bleak

Hubby knows
My Sunday plan
In fact, of my poems
He’s rather a fan

I pick up my pen
To begin the ditty
Aiming for clever
Charming and witty

Hubby gets chatty
The moment I start
I have to tell him
I’m not that smart

I can’t converse
And rhyme together
Talk to me later
About the weather

All Rights Reserved

A Cue Ball Mysteries Mug Plug

Pastels, peaches, purples, and pink
This mug is beautiful, this I think
It would even look nice in a kitchen sink
And better yet, with your favorite drink

Look at Hubby, oh-so-smug
With his Cue Ball Mysteries mug
Your coffee, too, longs to be lugged
In such a mug, so here’s the plug

Comment below in the next few days
And if you’re lucky, you might just may
Win a mug, but you must enter to play
If I draw your name, Hip Hip Hooray!

The mug is most handy, as you see here
I use mine for Cue Ball Mysteries gear
It would also make a fine stein for your beer
For usefulness, this mug has no peer

Only twenty exist on earth
In fact, I’d call it a Cue Ball Mysteries mug dearth
So enter to join the fun and the mirth
But this contest is short, with a narrow berth

Contest closes on Saturday, December 21, 2013, at midnight
That’s Eastern Standard Time and it would be a fright
If you forgot to enter, think of your plight
If you lost your chance to have this mug within sight

All Rights Reserved

Please comment below for a chance to win. I will draw one name on Sunday, December 22, and the lucky winner will get a Cue Ball Mysteries mug of their very own!

Four Play, The Poem

This week I have
Something to shout
My fourth novel Four Play
Is published and out
It took a whole year
And at times I did pout

But now I can smile
Since Four Play is here
Want to know more?
Well, please do not fear
In the fourth Cue Ball Mystery
These issues appear

There’s a murder of course
And Jimmy Beak plays a part
Jessie’d like to get rid of him
It would be a good start
And how does she do that?
Don’t worry, she’s smart

Bad plumbing also
Is a recurring theme
This may sound boring
But it’s not what it seems
It involves sci fi monsters
Who make people scream!

But now I have told you
As much as I plan
So go buy the book, silly
It’s at Amazan
You’ll like it a lot
Please tell all your clan

All rights reserved

The Cue Ball Mysteries’ Producer: A Tribute

The assistant, the producer
Whatever he’s called
My fantastical hubby
I sincerely applaud

I write my stories
And work out the plots
But hubby? He does
A whole heck of a lots

At all technical issues
I am far from astute
Without help from hubby
My books go capoot

Setting margins and font size
How does this work?
I ask hubby to help me
And with nary a smirk

He takes over my laptop
And while I’m not looking
He fixes all problems
And yep—He also does cooking!

Formatting for kindle
And website design
These skill sets I lack
But my hubby’s refined

And so as I get
My next book self-published
Claiming my self did it
All would be rubbish

I could write all I wanted
But without hubby’s assistance
Only in my dreams
Would my books be existent

All Rights Reserved

The Sunday Night Blues

When it comes to Sundays
They have a way
Of going where they will
No matter what I say

I always make plans
To get a lot done
But what else comes up?
Most everything under the sun

My to-do list lingers
With nothing crossed off
It’s as if Sunday knows
At my lists it should scoff

I plan to go shopping
But a call from a friend
Sets me back hours
The thing never ends

Once I get to the store
My needs they don’t stock
Sunday showed them my list
Clerk says check down the block

But the shop down the street
Today closes early
I go home empty-handed
My mood turning surly

Okay, I’ll try laundry
But lo, I’m out of soap
Maybe I’ll go back to bed
Cuz’ I’m finding it hard to cope

Sunday night is now here
I give up and drink wine
Next Sunday will go better
And everything will be fine

But deep down and honestly
I already know
Next Sunday’s to-do list
To the winds I should throw

All Rights Reserved

Having a Say in Four Play

My beta readers
Are patient sorts
They’re reading my book
I await their reports

As much as I can
I revise and re-do
Beta readers get a look
When I think I am through

They read quite closely
They look for all flaws
And when they criticize
It gives me great pause

If something bores them
They let me know
I take the book back
And give it another go

Sticklers for detail
Grammarians they are
Without them my writing
Would set folks ajar

Intimidated not
They eat typos for lunch
Ah yes, I adore them
My beta reader bunch

Thanks to John, Kathy, Megan
Sharon and Jean
Better beta readers
The world has not seen!

All Rights Reserved

Whimsical Wednesday: Drunk with no E’s by Pam Barchers

Whimsical Wednesday With Friends is back!

Here’s fellow author (she writes Sci-Fi) Pamela Barchers’ contribution! Pam recently attended a writers workshop, and was given the following assignment: Write about a drunk guy at a bar. Easy, you say? Well here’s the catch. Pam had to write the description with no E’s. That’s correct. Zero E’s. She did it! And here’s her A+ assignment. When she does use E’s, Pam writes the Adelia Kayland Personal Logs–the adventures of a space traveler! 1st log up–Out Of Time, available on Amazon, along with Time Again and Manipulated Time. Check it out! But before you head over to Amazon, be sure to read about that drunk guy with no E’s…

Here is a link to the book: Out of Time by Pamela Barchers

Drunk with no E’s

Sitting in a bar, I spy a man who has had too much to drink.

I think I know this man.
Oh right, it’s Frank who owns a cabin a block down from us.

It’s obvious, from watching him wriggling on his stool, that Frank will soon go looking for a bathroom.

This is wrong, I’m thinking.
I thought Frank didn’t drink.
His brown suit looks dingy; has his old “ball-and-chain” thrown him out again? Poor thing!

I was right in my first assumption; Frank and his dingy brown suit slid off of his stool, stumbling forward to look for a bathroom.
Painfully, I watch this poor guy work his way forward, bumping into things, and gaining odd looks from many happy hour participants.

Finally, as Frank was almost to his mark, a crowd of idiots (thinking it funny) join to block his way.
Laughing at him mockingly, said boys would not allow him to pass.
Starting to pity him, I stood up to assist.
(Actually, I was not to worry for long.)

Surprisingly, I saw Frank work things out on his own, by unzipping his brown dingy pants, and casually urinating on a culprit’s foot!