Whimisical Wednesday: Armchair Hellraiser

A poet published in Romania? Now that’s downright zania! But it’s also true! This week’s guest poet Andy Flatt once published his poetry in Romania. Like last week’s Andy, this Andy is also a Brit. Don’t ask me what it is with guys named Andy from the UK who enjoy silly poetry, but I’m not complaining. Here’s Andy’ bio and his totally awesome, amusing and charming poem. Thanks, Andy!

Armchair Hellraiser

I want to be a hellraiser,
And party till the dawn.
Make curtains twitch when I come home,
And neighbours look with scorn.

I want to paint the town red,
And spend the night carousing.
Drinking endless tequila shots,
Whilst madly rebel rousing.

But I am pushing sixty,
And I can’t hold my drink.
Just one beer and I feel queer.
And throw up in the sink.

The last time I went on the town,
With my red pot of paint.
After an hour in a noisy club,
I really felt quite faint.

So I will sit in my armchair,
And have a snooze instead
I’ll dream of being a hellraiser
It’s safer in my head.

©Andy Flatt2012
Used With Permission

I live with my two rescue Greyhounds, Jazz and Layla, in the county of Kent, which is known as the garden of England. Currently I am working as a home tutor, working with children of all ages to develop their literacy and numeracy skills.  In my spare time, when I am not spending quality time with the greyhounds or indulging in my passion for Argentine Tango, I write poetry, for both adults and children, which I find extremely enjoyable.  My poems have featured in several publications and I hope to publish my first collection in the near future.

My favourite poets, which range from the sublime to the ridiculous, include Andrew Marvell, Robert Frost and Spike Milligan. I write poetry on whatever subject takes my fancy and, while it is not exactly profound, I hope it makes people smile.




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